i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
BRING THE BAGELS
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
