their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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