Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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