This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
