I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
