the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize