his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
