Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
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