The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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