I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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