Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
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