I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
