there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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