operation harelip BJ is a go
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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