The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Randomize
