Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
