My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
