Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Randomize
