Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize