Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
You have to summon your inner elephant
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
