I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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