You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
