4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
you didnt know i had herpes?
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
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