I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
The beer is more important than you right now.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
