hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
