trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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