Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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