how do flat chested girls get laid?
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize