i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize