hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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