I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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