there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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