Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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