you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
