is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize