Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
