Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
