just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize