i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
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