Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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