Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
