I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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