Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
