TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
