"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize