theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
