So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Randomize
