what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
