Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize