You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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