When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
