Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
i used baking grease as lip gloss
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
this will be a night to untag.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Randomize
